I am scared that I’m going to wake up one morning and my husband won’t be there.
Or that we’ll be without a home.
Or a way to support my family.
Waking up to find out that I’m pregnant would also fall in this category. Which is odd, because every time I hear someone announcing that they’re expecting or see a baby, my uterus literally LEAPS.
I want to hold my own child so badly…
And yet, I know it’s not the right time.
But will it ever be the RIGHT time? With everything going on in the world, do I really think it’s a good idea to bring a baby in to the world, no matter when that may be?
I’m not sure… I don’t have the answer… and so every month around that time, I breath a sigh of relief. But there is always a part of me that is depressed at the same time.
There are so many things that make me fearful of the future… and it seems like there are more now than ever. I wonder why that is.